on the value of spontaneity

Life has a way of throwing us off our path, of chucking us curveballs, or giving us the unexpected. But who, or what, is this life? Someone once challenged my use of this personified version of the word that we use otherwise use to describe the act of living... of being alive. Yet none of these words really give us a proper definition of the concept it describes. We distinguish between being life and death, and between things that have life (animate beings) and things that don't have life (inanimate objects). But what is life?

Let's just touch on the philosophy of that, for a moment. It seems impossible to know what "life" really is because it is as inherent as our existence (and likewise it is something our existence depends upon). Descartes is famously quoted for having said "I think, therefore I am," reflecting the idea that the only thing one can be absolutely certain of is one's own existence. Although this philosophy may have it's own flaws, it should be noted that, given some proper thought, we can reasonably doubt quite a lot, if not everything. 

Likewise, it seems that our definition of "life" is flawed in a number of ways. Although it is easy to say that animals such as ourselves are "alive," it gets more complicated the smaller we go. Are bacteria and viruses alive? What about one-celled organisms? What about cells themselves? Or the atoms within the cells? We are, of course, just made up of trillions of cells and all of those cells are made up of even smaller particles. So what makes us so unique? So... alive?

I realize that this is contests our superiority complex. In fact, this line of questioning contests a lot about the way in which we look at life. But here we are again, back to "life," a personified abstraction (for there seems no better way of describing it). Maybe it is my own way of ascribing a label to some unknown force that is beyond our understanding. I'm not religious, but it's my guess that so many of us are because there is so much that we just cannot comprehend. 

Allow me to digress. My life philosophy of late (here we go again, throwing that word around) has been to "go with the flow." To follow, in some ways, a winding path that has no specific trajectory, to accept things that happen to me and around me in such a way that allows me to adjust with relative ease. This not only reduces anxiety, but also allows one to see new opportunities as they arise. 

Note: it's important to make a distinction between going with the flow by accepting things you can't control (like the weather) and by merely choosing the path of least resistance (like becoming a couch potato). Sometimes, we do need to fight the current and do something difficult in order to accomplish something great. You can't reach the top of a mountain without climbing up it, first. 

If there's anything I'm realizing, it's that it is important to be flexible. We can't always accomplish what we set out to do, whether that is finishing a project, meeting a deadline, or climbing a mountain. And that's okay. It's true what they say: you learn from your mistakes, and from your failures. 

So, you might ask. How does spontaneity come in to play? I'm glad you asked. Ask yourself this: what does it mean to be spontaneous? Are you spontaneous in your own life?

I know that I'm in Nepal, and I'm "supposed to" be seeing all of these great sites, visiting other cities, even hiking all around. The truth is, I'm doing some of those things, and yet, at the same time, I'm not. I haven't been planning my days around sightseeing, in part because I am working 5 days a week, with little downtime in the evenings to barely do things like cook and climb, and also in part because I get anxiety about planning excursions. 

My friend Cat is in Nepal with me right now. She arrived last week, and she leaves at the same time I do, in about two weeks. More so than me, she enjoys sightseeing, especially when it comes to learning about local culture and society. She also doesn't have to work, so she has spent her first few days wandering around the city, visiting temples and museums. And that's wonderful. She plans her days relatively spontaneously, or at least that's the impression I get. 

Yesterday, however, we both got a taste of anxiety when what we had originally planned to do (visit one of the surrounding national parks) was no longer the best option after our late start to the day (sleeping in plus a pancake brunch). For a while, we were at a loss of what to do. I started getting anxious, being reminded of similar difficulties with my ex-boyfriend while we were traveling around Australia more than a year ago. But then, after staring at the map in the guide book I purchased but haven't really used, we discovered a lake (more like a pond) that we could more or less hike to. So we set off, in a direction with which I was already familiar, and walked up to a temple, around a gorge, through a park, and finally to the lake. Our path was relatively spontaneous, guided ever-so-slightly by google maps and a (terrible) sense of direction on both of our parts.

Even though we didn't do what we had originally planned to, we still had a great day. We walked around, saw new places, and had the chance to properly talk to one another, which we hadn't done in a long time. Although it's not as if I haven't had numerous people to talk to lately, I had lately been feeling the need to have a good chat with a friend. And besides, the mountains will be around for us to climb on another day.

As always, please reach out if you have any comments or stories you would like to share. You can do so via the comments section below, the contact form on the homepage of this blog, or on social media. 

Namaste. 

Taudaha Lake (Pond)